I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
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