Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
He disabled his match.com account in front of me
my vag is so smooth its legendary
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize