a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
do nipples grow back?
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
