he puts the penis in happiness.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
