PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
