My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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