Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
