Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
handjob tips. give me some.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
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