I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Randomize
