eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
My ATM looks so different sober.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
