I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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