You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
