I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
as a side note pls kill me
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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