And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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