Well douche your snatch and let's go!
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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