Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
I think people are normalizing furries
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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