We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Found your dick twin last night
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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