Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
Randomize
