Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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