Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
