I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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