you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
