Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
