haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
