the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Randomize
