drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
farters have to be the big spoon...
There r osticjed everywhere
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize
