can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
