my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize
