Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
