would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Randomize
