No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
