Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
