So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Randomize
