my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Randomize