you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
