I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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