He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize
