come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I just threw up on my dentist
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Randomize
