just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
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