i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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