I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
