all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Randomize