remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Randomize