and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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