I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
