I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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