Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
