i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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