I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Randomize
