i jhust puked up my retainher.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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