can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
