I got chris browned last night
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
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